in|掌握Concise + Logic,留学生秒变写作大神!( 二 )


过于啰嗦的复杂句不但不能在这种时候炫技 , 还会让招生官无法准确获取你想表达的意思 。 在申请的竞争环节 , 这样完全就是让自己凉到底 。
真正的写作技巧提升方式是什么?应该是简洁精确的书面表达 , 以及逻辑严谨的思考 。 所以不要再疯狂堆砌那些所谓的“例句” 。
Concise + Logic!
03.Be Concise实用法则

in|掌握Concise + Logic,留学生秒变写作大神!
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Flora
能用一个词 , 千万别用多个词 。
短句永远比长句好 。
如何做到简洁精确的书面表达?以下是一些实用法则用于同学们在写作时自我检查 。
能用一个词 , 不用多个词
减少介词的使用
Example:
The reason for the failure of the basketball team of the University of North Carolina in the Final Four game against the team from Kansas was that on that day and at that time, some players were frequently unable to rebound the ball.
Revision:
UNC’s basketball team lost the Final Four game against Kansas because it could not consistently rebound the ball.
用词语替代短语
Example:
In the event that going out for the purpose of eating with them cannot be avoided, it is necessary that we first go to the ATM, in light of the fact that I am out of cash.
Revision:
If we must go out to eat with them, we should first go to the ATM because I am out of cash.
删掉不必要的副词
e.g. very few=rare
删掉重复修饰的形容词
e.g. each and every book = every book
删除不必要的限定词
去掉actually, really, basically, probably, very, definitely, somewhat, kind of, extremely, practically等这类词
Example:
Because a great many of the words in this sentence are basically unnecessary, it would really be a very good idea to edit somewhat for conciseness.
Revision:
Because many of the words in this sentence are unnecessary, we should edit it.
能用简单词 , 不用复杂词
e.g. simultaneously with = while
有话直说
直接删掉it is quite true that / it is clear that这类没有任何用途的套话
少用被动句
被动语态不是一种语法错误 , 在符合逻辑的科学使用语境下它是有用的 。 但是用被动语态写作往往会导致用词过多 。
被动句也会让你的读者感到越读越困惑 , 必须耐心找出句子的主语 。
因此 , 如果不是必须被动语态表达的情况 , 尽量写作主语排在第一位的主动句 。 方便导师或者招生官的阅读 。
Example:
The 1780 constitution of Massachusetts was written by John Adams.
Revision:
John Adams wrote the 1780 Massachusetts Constitution.
Another example:
The letter was taken to the mailbox by Sally.
Revision:
Sally took the letter to the mailbox.
别用从句套从句
Example:
In high school, where I had the opportunity for three years of working with the student government, I realized how significantly a person’s enthusiasm can be destroyed merely by the attitudes of his superiors.
Revision:
In high school, during three years on the student council, I saw students’ enthusiasm destroyed by insecure teachers and cynical administrators.
英文写作时 , 可以凭借以上实用法则 , 一边写一边自我审视;也可以在文书或论文成稿后 , 自我proofreading时参考这些规则 。
另外 , 有效的输入自然会有优秀的输出 。 所以 , 多阅读海外文献或者新闻也是有利的 , 因为文献或者报刊的用语往往简洁流畅 。

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